The Unmistakable Softness

Cheers to Growing Up Gay

The Herrera brothers in contrapposto, 1990

Cheers to growing up Gay with a flaming capital G. 

To the limp wrists in our childhood photos, to telling on ourselves before we could talk. To tears streaked in playground dirt, to the bullies who told us what we were before we knew. To slurs we picked up, dusted off and made our own. To trying on our mother’s heels. To their fear we’d die of AIDS. To the tender disappointment of our fathers, if we were lucky. To waiting for a same-sex kiss on TV, only to watch the camera pan away. To the girlfriends whose hearts we broke when our Gaydar beeped for the first time. To our private, dirty humor, so acerbic it can melt chrome. To our cackle. To “is he...you know?” To that quality straight actors win Oscars for, but can never get quite right. To identifying one another in a packed subway and dark park with a glance. To that swish, lisp and contrapposto. 

Cheers to our unmistakable softness.

-Leo Herrera

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VIDEOS & AUDIO

1. Poetry reading by Jake Shears. Image submissions used with permission.

2. Performance: Music by Ash. Commissioned for the New York City Gay Men’s Chorus by John J. Atorino, artistic director. Performed in NYC, December 2023.

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Unmistakable Softness is on page 69 of POST, my debut book of poems.

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